Speaking of
by Live Fast Die Never
Summary: The stars of Friends discuss the finale of... LOST, Harry Potter and more to come. SPOILERS!
1. LOST Season Three Finale

"I'm bored." Joey whined and grabbed up his beer, "You guys have a boring house now that kids are here."

Phoebe, Rachel, Ross, and Joey had come to visit Monica and Chandler. Jack and Erica had been put to bed a bit earlier and Emma was sleeping in the guest room. So now it was just the six friends.

Rachel suddenly sat up, "I know what we can talk about! The Grey's Anatomy finale!" She grinned brilliantly.

Joey shook his head, "No way, I don't watch any of that Soap Opera crap!" He took another swing of his drink.

"Joe, you watch LOST." Chandler commented, "Not to mention you act in a Soap Opera."

Joey laughed, "First, I never watch DoOL anyways, second, LOST is full of adventure and violence."

Chandler just nodded looking unconvinced, "Okay Joe."

"Speaking of LOST," Phoebe started, "Who saw the season three finale?"

"Oh My God!" Rachel said putting her hand over her chest, "That was _so_ good!"

Phoebe nodded, "I know! And Kate is with Sawyer!"

Everyone stopped and looked at Phoebe weirdly. Rachel shook her head, "She is not. Jack said he loved her, if anything she's with Jack."

"No! In the flash forwards, it's obvious that she is with Sawyer." Phoebe answered with a chuckle; "I mean honestly, some people are so in denial."

"Sawyer was in the coffin!" Rachel hissed at Phoebe loudly, "Come on Monica, back me up!"

Monica shook her head, "Who cares?! All I can think about is Charlie dying!"

Chandler laughed loudly, "You're crying about the junkie hobbit! Nobody liked him."

Monica glared at him, "Everybody liked Charlie, and you're just sore about Boone dying in season one!"

"Hey!" Chandler said defending himself, "Boone had a lot of potential to explore!"

Ross rolled his eyes, "Boone was gross, and he slept with his sister. I mean, that's like me sleeping with Monica."

Everyone paused for a moment and looked off into space, they all looked quite disturbed and then turned back to each other.

Joey shrugged, "I don't really care. They still have hot people on the show anyways!"

Rachel was still glaring at Phoebe, "I'll have you know that Jack and Kate are going to be together."

"But she already slept with Sawyer _and_ said she loved him." Phoebe countered, "How are they going to get together now?"

Rachel rolled her eyes, "Like that means anything."

"What about that thing with Hurley and the car?" Ross asked, "That was pretty cool how the guy went flying backwards."

"Not as cool as when Boone"- Chandler paused and thought about it for a moment, "Wow, he was pretty useless."

"Yeah, pretty much." Monica said and then shook her head, "Do you think that they can bring him back?"

"Who?" Rachel asked,

Phoebe nodded, "Yeah, who?"

"Charlie!" Monica cried out, "Come on! It was heartbreaking!"

"I told you nobody cared about the hobbit." Chandler said mocking her.

Joey's eyes widened, "Charlie died?!"

Ross gave him a strange look at Joey, "Yes. He drowned."

"What?!" Joey's face got screwed up, "I just thought he was going swimming."

Nobody moved and just looked at him oddly for a long time before Chandler suddenly grinned, "The vision thing! The one Locke had, Boone was really cool in that!"

They all looked at each other and shrugged.

"And it doesn't even really count." Ross said with a sympathetic expression, "Boone was kind of dead for that…"

"Damn it!" Chandler cursed.

Just then Rachel turned to Phoebe, "Jack is in love with Kate and Sawyer refused to let her come along with him."

"Can we please move on!" Ross cried out, "There are more important things than who Kate ends up with!"

"Yeah!" Monica agreed, "Like Charlie dying!"

Ross sighed, "No. There are more important things than that too."

"All the hot people?" Joey questioned.

"No." Ross answered once more, starting to get annoyed with the whole conversation.

Chandler suddenly looked up happily, "Whether or not Juliet is really a good guy?"

"No!" Ross said angrily, but then paused, "although that is a good one."

"What Ross?" Phoebe asked, "What could be more important than Kate getting together with Sawyer instead of Jack?"

Ross rolled his eyes, "Well, it's a question that I have been wondering for ages and I don't know if we are ever going to get the answer but"-

"You know the monster is black smoke, right?" Chandler questioned, cutting off Ross's speech.

Joey nodded, "Yeah, and that Charlie is dead."

"Or that Locke was pushed out of a window and that's why he couldn't walk." Rachel added in.

Phoebe grinned, "Or that they are not all at the California Adventure Park."

"Yeah, and that Rousseau's child, Alex, is a girl." Monica said.

Ross glared at them all, "No! I want to know why Mikhail just doesn't DIE!"

For one moment nobody spoke and it was completely silent except for Ross's heavy breathing.

"It's Kate and Jack, Phoebe." Rachel snapped, "Why can't you just get that you hippie!"

* * *

**Author's Note: **Okay, so I was watching friends and thinking about LOST because I really want to see the next season so, I thought this up. I think it kind of makes sense for the characters, but kind of not. DoOL is Day's of Our Lives, with Joey pronoucing it Duel. 

Anyways, just a little fun with our favorite Friends stars talking about LOST.

R&R  
Live Fast Die Never


	2. Harry Potter Book Seven

"Hey, did you guys read the latest Harry Potter book?" Ross asked as he came into the living room from the kitchen holding a beer for himself and a diet coke that he handed to Rachel.

"Yeah!" Chandler said, "It was actually good."

Monica nodded happily unable to supress a grin and cried out, "I knew Snape was good!"

Phoebe scoffed and shrugged, "If that's how you want to look at it."

"What?" Monica questioned a little confused.

Phoebe shook her head, "It's probably to complex for you anyways, but Monica, Snape is bad."

"What?!" Rachel cried out as placed her diet coke on the table, "Snape was bad!"

"Sweetie, I know you're in shock but, use a coaster!" Monica told her friend in what she believed to be a calm and polite way.

Rachel rolled her eyes and grabbed a coaster for her drink. She then picked up where she had left off, "I don't want to know this stuff, I'm watching the movies!"

Ross's jaw dropped, "What?!" He screeched, "That's like saying you didn't read Lord of the Rings."

"Sweetie," Rachel began as she put her hand on Ross's, "I only watched the movie for Orlando Bloom, Elijah Wood, and Viggo Mortenson."

"What?!" Ross screeched once more, "I cannot believe this! JRR Tolkien was a genius who wrote one of the greatest triolgies to date." He shook his head enraged, "And you! You only watched THE MOVIE for the actors!"

"Yeah." Rachel answered then turned to the rest of the group, "So, guys, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't talk about the seventh book... or the sixth one until the movies are made."

Phoebe immediatly turned to Monica, "I cannot wait for the forest scene in the seventh movie! You know, when he's going to his death and he kind of brings back his parents, Sirius, and Remus."

"Phoebe!" Rachel said

"What?" Phoebe asked annoyance in her voice, "I'm talking about the movies." She turned back to Monica.

"That was such a great part... I cried when I read it," Monica said her voice cracking a bit, "It was so heart breaking."

Phoebe nodded, "You know, another sad one is when Snape's feelings for Lily are revealed. I feel so sorry for the evil bastard." She said sadly,

"Phoebe," Monica began, "Snape was good."

"Sure..." Phoebe said rolling her eyes.

"The saddest part, for me, was when Dobby died." Ross choked out, "The poor little guy was just saving Harry Potter."

"What?" Rachel said quietly, "Dobby died!"

"Yeah, along with Hedwig, Moodym, Fred, Lupin, Tonks, Collin Creevey... Oh, and Voldemort." Chandler said listing off all of the deaths to Rachel.

"Hedwig?" Rachel croaked, "His bird! She killed his bird! Why? What kind of sick person would do that."

"Actually," Ross said, using his annoying factual voice. "JK Rowling killed off Hedwig as a sign of Harry's childhood and safety being over." He nodded at the explanation, "I think that was a very clever way of doing it, and it also showed that anyone could go."

"Who cares what it shows!" Rachel cried out, " I loved that bird, poor Harry..."

"Frankly, I found myself a little more affected by the actual characters dying." Chandler quipped, "But whatever works for you."

"I thought the Lupin and Tonks dying was the worst. Leaving their son..." Monica said, "That was so awful."

"Lupin and Tonks got together?" Rachel questioned then gained a puzzled look, "I know who Lupin is... but is Tonks the one with the purple hair in this latest movie?"

"Yes." Phoebe answered automatically and then continued on ignoring Rachel's words, "Fred hit me the hardest."

"Fred!" Rachel squeaked.

"After George lost his ear," another squeak from Rachel, "I thought, "Oh well, that really sucks." Then when Fred died I was thinking, "Well, now George has nothing on Fred."" She noddded thinking over what she was thinking, " Oh, and Fred was my second favorite... oh, Thank God Luna's okay."

"Fred was your second favorite? Not George?" Chandler questioned.

Monica and Phoebe laughed at this.

"That's a good one." Monica choked out.

"I didn't mean it to be funny, but okay..." He trailed off and turned to look at Ross. Ross was now glaring crazily at Monica and Phoebe.

"George Weasley," Ross started angrily, "Is a very noble and strong individual who loves to have fun and enjoy himself as much as his now deceased brother!"

"George never struck me as the noble type." Rachel commented.

"What do you know!" Ross spat at her, "You've only seen the movies."

Just then Joey walked in the house and entered the living room holding a meatball sub in his hand, he then sat down next to Rachel and took a bite out of it, "So, what are we talking about?"

"Harry Potter." Chandler answered calmly.

Joey nodded and took another bite from his sub, "Who's he?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Alright, I had so much fun writing the LOST one that I had to continue and this just popped into my mind. Hope you like it. 

R&R  
Live Fast Die Never


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